The plate in the microwave

Ok I just needed to discuss this with you all. I have been married for 4 years (pretty young marriage) and with my husband for 7 yrs and it's nothing short of a phenomenal ride. What triggered me then to write about my marriage today? The leftover plate in the microwave... You are probably like huh? What does that mean? But yes it literally was triggered by a plate he left in the microwave.

So for years my husband eats something, and if he doesn't finish the whole plate, he saves some for late, however later never comes, so that plate of leftover food in the microwave ends up stinking up the kitchen until I find it a day later. And you know what's funny? The minute I throw the bad food away he asks "where is the plate i was saving?" It's the darndest thing I tell you.

I thought about it today and realised there are two kinds of people in this world. The person who regardless of what they leave in their plate, throws it away because they know they will never touch that food again, and those that will save whatever is left for a rainy day. If you had not guessed it by now, I'm the one who throws it all out no matter what. If I am done with something that's it. I will not look back at it again. Same is true of my relationships with friends, family, acquaintances etc. Once I feel your purpose in my life has reached its maximum, I tend to keep it moving. My husband is the type who has so many friends and so many people who think of him as a friend because he has such a huge heart and space for everyone he comes across in life in it.

We could look at the plate in another light, does Nash save food, because he is inherently a rainy day type of person? You know what I mean, he probably thinks, hey I am full right now, but that doesn't mean I won't appreciate what is left later. Meanwhile, I am like ok done, toss it all! And that is why I thought about this in reflection to marriage. Nash will always always be the one that thinks of us tomorrow vs us today. He talks about the future a lot more than I do. I love this about him, because I can never see past today, this very moment in time. It's probably why some of my problems always seem unfixable, just because I am so wrapped up in the moment and the disaster of that moment, I cannot see how to get out of it. He has to be the one to literally shake it out of me and remind me that this too shall pass. No problem is ever too big for Nash. He may be stressed about something, but you would never even sense it because he will still smile and laugh with everyone around him. Meanwhile, I become a grouch and just want everyone to stay away from me!

I know what you are thinking, it's a lot to get from a plate in the microwave, however that is who I am. I psycho analyze all situations. Any behavior for me must stem from some underlying, subconscious that we just don't tap into all the time. Perhaps growing up Nash and his family always treated food with respect and knew not to waste, meanwhile, as much as my parents tried to teach us how lucky we were to have 3 meals a day, my siblings and I were always wasteful. I remember my little brother used to have food hiding spots in our house. Under a couch, a rug, a hole in the garden etc, just so the parents think he ate when all the kids knew he did not. I am not in no way bragging about this trait, it's just so unfortunate that I grew up not appreciating the value of money. It hit me like a tonne of bricks as an adult though! I cook exactly enough for that meal, ask any of my friends... haha they would tell you Ru is a stingy cook. There is never enough for a random visitor who would show up, and this is because, I Don't want to have to throw the food away.

Another thing that was triggered by the plate in the microwave is how Nash always says thank you after any meal. Up to today, I tell no lies. My husband will eat his meal and as soon as he is done he says "thank you. That was delicious" and then if there is anything left in goes the plate into the microwave for "later". It's the most admirable trait he possesses to be honest. The fact that he is so appreciative of the time I would have put in the kitchen. I tend to forget pleasantries like this. Once again, ask my friends. If someone calls me and says "Hi Ru, how r u?" I usually respond with "good". And never ask how they are. It's a flaw people! It's not that I don't care to know how you are, it's the Aquarius in me that just doesn't know how to act in social situations. I am also terrible at giving compliments!

All this goes to say that when you find your true partner, you start to notice that where you lack, they compliment, and that is where the partnership comes in. I would never say Nash completes me, because I believe people should be enough alone, however he definitely COMPLIMENTS me, and even though he has weird quirks like the plate in the microwave, together we are creating some pretty bad ass "meals" for future generations.

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